mrs.lotte

sleepybunny, no one would want to send their child to a school where they thought that child may be frightened. However Ofsted is a snapshot of the few days that they visit (not saying they were wrong, I have no idea, just that it may not have been wholly representative of all the childen's experience). However you will note that subsequent ofsted reports have very firmly said that this is not an area of concern anymore. Things can and do change for the better very quickly. I'm no fan of Southwark LEA, far from it, but don't underestimate the power of committed parents who can make a real difference to any school. It seems to me that the parents of pre-school children posting on this and similar threads will be an asset to whatever school their children join. However it's hard to do that if the school is miles away. Don't write off your local only on the ofsted report (not directed to you sleepybunny, obvious from your post that you have spoken to teachers too). Go and see for yourselves, talk to parents and the pta. Good luck people

Thanks Beth. I can"t be there (working) but could you mention the proposal for an open day for people applying for reception and nursery places? Ta Have a biscuit for me.

Healthy cake - yuk! If you start serving any child free friend some healthy cake with no sugar they will think you have gone mad. I'm with Gubodge on this (tho I have sweet tooth). Give the littleun a small bit of cake or give them a rice cake and the adults something nice. Sorry handstands doesn't answer your question, I was just putting in a good word for delicious sugary cake!

However you would not get into Goose Green (or at least not in first round of offers) unless you actually put it on your list. It is currently oversubscribed i.e 2 full reception classes and a waiting list. Don't make the mistake of thinking that if you dont get into heber/goodrich/st anthony's/dulwich village etc then you will get goose green - you won't, it will be Camelot or John Donne or Peckham Park or suchlike. I have observed children travelling to Goose Green from Camberwell, Nunhead and beyond, walking past children who live in ED and are on waiting list and that is because they put it down as a choice in the first place!

Another vote for simply childcare. Also this forum seems to have lots of people advertising their own nannies who they no longer need! However my wonderful fab nanny (def not up for grabs) came to me via an advert I put in fourways chemist, Herne Hill; she was ex-Nelly's nursery and I think it's quite common for nursery staff to move into nannying so that might be another source... I really dont think that there is any need to pay agency fees; personally I would have wanted to check references and confirm the CRB check myself anyway so not sure what you are paying for. Good luck

How can you know that you are not happy with a school that your child hasn't actually been to? We have taken the opposite view; try the state school and if that doesn't work think about transferring to private. Have a look at mumsnet if you have a spare hour or two - a real debate rages on this point. Many people think that once you start private it's a big wrench to transfer to state rather than vice versa. However when my son was allocated a primary school near new cross (we live near Goose Green) we went to the private schools; lots and lots of parents did the same. I wished I had got the insurance policy earlier; it was no fun for him having 3 assessments in one week or for us to have to assess the various schools with little time to research. In the end we were allocated our local school; Goose Green and we went for it. So far he is really happy there and we are very impressed with the standards of teaching and discipline and the rest of his classmates seem delightful. To answer your question; yes you are liable for a term's fees according to the terms and conditionsof all the schools I saw Good luck, do whatever you think is right for you but best to get on with it; suspect that they will be having assessments soonish!

There was an article on this in the family section of the saturday Guardian - i think last week (but may have been week before)- maybe still available online - seem to recall it had some practical advice.

Really pleased to hear that is going so well for you Cora. I know that parents making their applications now are worried that there are not enough local places to go around so in a way your post is reassuring! 15 in the class that's better than Alleyn's!

The admission criteria is on their website but basically the church places are prioritised, of the remaining 25 places, 2 are ring fenced for hearing impaired children then looked after children, special education needs (not sure what order), siblings (siblings made up a third of the intake this year) then, finally - proximity to school. If it is your nearest school then you would be prioritised over someone who lived closer to the school but it wasnt their nearest school e.g if they lived closer to st j than you but closer to Goose Green than st.john"s

Schools do have open days but you can also call to make an appointment. Talking to parents who have children at the school who are also involved with the pta would, imo, be a very useful guide; possibly more so than ofsted or sats. CT Wac; I do understand the concern of 2010 parents; it's all still raw for me but if your comments relate to my post then I can assure you that I am not in any way seeking to undermine our community; far from it, we chose a local school in Special Measures over a very well regarded private school precisely because we want to support our community. The message I and I think other posters (not speaking for them just my interpretation) are trying to convey is; if you want a local school; put down your nearest school and/or one of the traditionally less popular local schools. I didn't put GG or BG down and was initially allocated a school outside our community; i didnt even bother to look at GG never mind put it down on my list, I wish I had it would have saved me a lot of heartache and I hope that by sharing that experience it saves someone else a similar fate.

If your neighbour has kids it was probably a "poor you" look, if they don"t then haha; one day they will and they'll remember that look with shame and regret. Keep up the good work emc, my admiration for single mums is boundless; you sound like a lovely mum

I'm a really shouty mum - for a lot less than keeping me awake all night. Hate myself for it but I am by nature someone with quite a short fuse. Children have made me a million times more patient than before but we are none of us a saint (tho you sound pretty close to it to me!) and 3yo is, imo, old enough to be disciplined and to be staying in their own bed - I would be cross long before exhaustion set in and 10 times more so if I had to do it alone. The thing is that when I shout at my 4 year old he shouts back which is horrible. So if I do lose it I generally say sorry for the shouting but maintain the telling off. Maybe that sounds indulgent but it works for me. Hey they are all going to be in therapy in 20 years either saying - my mum shouted at me or i wish my mum had set me some boundaries - you cant win, don't beat yourself up about it.

I tried Tayo but he never returned my calls. Peckham Pulse claimed to do it but never got back to me. My 4 year old goes to Latchmere - lessons with Alex who is fab. Not cheap but worth it.

I dont live in a flat but suspect that the people upstairs will be more disturbed by your new born than vice versa. Whenever my totally lovely next door neighbour has a late nighter i feel briefly irritated then remember that a. I am pining for my lost youth and b. she has significant credit in the bank for nights of wailing, 6pm bellowing (from me) and early morning wheels on the bus sessions. You will probably be so tired that you wont notice the night time running around. Good luck! Edited to say; I'm sorry if that sounded unsympathetic, it wasn't meant to. I also know what it's like to have troublesome neighbours. When I had my first we lived next door to an elderly couple and their grown up daughter who all had mental health problems; lots of loud praise be style singing at all hours and pervading pong around the house. However when bub was born i was too dis-orientated to notice and they were lovely to him; forever telling me how handsome he was (which of course I knew already but a little confirmation went a long way!)

Primary or secondary? If primary then I anticipate that you have been following the threads on the subject. We too live near Goose Green and our boy did not get into st john's, dkh, heber or goodrich (the latter 2 by some considerable margin). On reflection Goodrich was a wasted choice as it was patently too far away. The furthest child away to get into st john's was less than 300metres from the school. We had a miserable few months before being allocated Goose Green in the second round; so far (only 4 days!!) that's going really well. It was important for us that our son went to a local school and the walking to school buzz is superb. I think they are changing the process this year allowing 6 choices. Fushia summed it up perfectly in an earlier thread; apply to your nearest school, if you put down schools that you understand to be good but have no chance of getting in to you will probably be allocated a school which is undersubscibed on the other side of the borough If it's secondary that you are looking for - sorry for wasting your time!! Good luck either way

Well my boy had his first day at Goose Green today - it was fab - he loved wearing his uniform, loved seeing the other children then the teachers emerged down the steps like Cheryl on the X Factor, all the children lined up and marched in without a backward glance. Picked him up 2 1/2 hrs later; full of beans, big hug for me, thumbs up from the teachers and a "scoop" of ice cream - what's not to love? When we got home 2 yr old sis put on his green jumper, grabbed his book bag marched to front door and announced that she was off to school. Not sure they realise that they have 14 years of it in front of them or how we are going to negotiate a fly by Just Williams every day but having initially been allocated John Donne school (great head, great ofsted, great sats but where exactly?!) and the months of stress that followed I wouldnt have thought that we would see first day of school with smiles all round. Take heart.

Re primary schools; our experience with the LiDem councillors was that they showed a total lack of empathy with the situation, a denial that the lack of places should have been forseen and, only now, an acceptance that there is any sort of problem. IMO It is incorrect and actually rather insulting to assert that everyone has now has a suitable place when many 4 year olds are about to start a school that was not chosen for them by their parents in the 4 choices available to them.

Has anyone tried the new barber on LL? Any good for an impatient 4 year old boy?

No personal experience of BG but hearing lots of positives about it including dynamic staff, lots of investment and a great early years centre. I know that there are quite a few EDers who didn't get a place at their chosen schools who were allocated BG and are taking up the place (some discussion about it previously on forum - just put Bessemer Grange in the search) If Heber was one of your original 4 choices then you will remain on the wait list and your acceptance of a place elsewhere will not affect this. However if not one of your original choices and you added self to wait list after allocation you will have to specifically ask to stay on the list after you have accepted BG. However in saying that Southwark give conflicting advice on this so probably best just to double and treble check that you remain on list. Are you a September start? if so what options do you have? Go for it, you might love it and i hear it's on it's way up. We didnt get any of our 4 choices and eventually allocated Goose Green which is very close to where we live (very near you) quite a few of us in same boat; I take view that it is best to mentally commit fully rather than go with an attitude that it is only until you can get in on wait list as i dont think they'll be a great deal of movement and there's no point not commiting - the kids ae bound to pick up on it. Whatever you deceide to do - good luck!!

As long as both families have the same sort of ideas about discipline/routines and go into it with a give and take attitude it will all be fine. It is hard with two babies as if both kick off at once your nanny cant really be expected to comfort both at once. However I am in the pro controlled crying camp (flame me if you want but both my kids are brilliant sleepers and always have been) mums of twins maybe in better position to advise if possible to comfort two crying babies at once. A good nanny should be able to get them into the same routine. You may not be a fan of routines but without one her life will be hell. She is an employee doing a difficult job and needs time to sit down/have lunch/tidy up/stick the washing on. Re swapping houses - my original share was one week at one, one at the other, subsequent shares have been at my house (upside not having to get darlings ready out and dropped, downside mess and expense of food) Nothing need be fixed in stone; suck it and see. I had an extra highchair cheap as chips from mothercare and useful for visitors or one of those that tie to normal chair that you will probably use yourself when you go out. Used travelcot for visiting baby which obviously need for selves anyway. Never needed anything else Activities; whippersnappers, general park stuff, little singing classes, ball pool, baby gym - basically anything except swimming I guess. In time they will also entertain each other. If one family running late and kids at others then maybe nanny would bring them round to other house and they could pay overtime in cash or (as we often did) let nanny go and other family look after baby gratis for a little while Both families have seperate contract with nanny not sure what would happen if wanted to end share but both families want to have nanny - sorry. We have a float that both families give an equal amount to each week for classes/bananas that sort of stuff Most important is to talk openly to each other; maybe have a meeting with both families and the nanny after about a month to check progress. Dont talk to nanny about other family behind back and dont niggle about the little things (they get more bananas out of the float than me, my baby spends all day in the doctor cos they are hypochondriacs about their baby) You'll probably find that it comes to a natural end when one of you gets pregnant again! Not purporting to know it all - others may disagree with me - just sharing my experience - hope it helps Also I rate nannypaye; they can advise about contract too.

Vertbaudet?

Well there definately is a shortage of "desirable" places; several local schools are highly oversubscribed. Last year Southwark published a booklet about how to make primary school applications and this gave a breakdown of how many applicants there had been to each school. This year, as I understand it, they plan to give far more information to parents e.g no. of sibling places last year (roughly a third at Stj, dkh, heber and goodrich - before bulge class added) and how close you have to be to get in (it's a bit more complicated than that but i think most of the readership in this thread will be familiar with 4th and 5th criterion). However although many of us were allocated a school 2+ miles away everyone I know was - eventually - allocated a local school albeit one they hadn't put in their initial 4. Not trying to belittle toast's campaign at all; we had the most horrible few months until we were allocated Goose Green and still anxious about it but just to say that i anticipate that next year will follow a similar pattern; lots of people with allocation to far flung school then a couple of months later second offer to closer school. This isn't going to get better only worse, I'm no expert on local demographics but common sense dictates that there is a need for another primary school in the area. In the meantime it seems to me in the interests of all local parents to support the local schools and press for improvement in those that are falling short. Good luck.

My little girl is a big fan of tiny gym in Camberwell leisure centre, not a class as such but possibly all the better (and certainly cheaper) for it. Diddidance from 2 years. No idea how to search for old thread - sorry

I bought a god-daughter a charm bracelet with a single charm made from her birthstone. I have since added charms on birthdays/christmas. Both my children received lots of lovely books for their baptisms; always a good bet. There are 2 amazing pop up books; alice in wonderland and wizard of oz, they are real works of art and available on amazon. I also rather like the idea of buying a star. You get sent a chart with your star plotted - very sweet. Edited to say; I have just looked on amazon there is also a peter pan pop up book (all by Robert Sabuda)

I have used nannypaye for the last 2 years and find them helpful, reliable and reasonably priced. If you have a nannyshare I would certainly advise that you should use a payroll company as it is rather more complicated than being a sole employer, furthermore it really is one less stress to deal with. Good luck